KopTalk.com Forums The Joke Thread (Keep it clean fella's)

My boss called me into his office and put me in charge of Sexual Harassment this morning.

So far I'm loving it, I've felt Linda from accounts tits and grabbed the cleaners arse.

LOVE this one.

I've just finished watching a film called "The day the Hip Hop died"

Turns out it's about the life and death of Tupac Shakur and nothing to do with Nicki Minaj getting a record deal.

http://www.mirror.co.uk/news/uk-news/youtube-video-woman-motorist-attempting-1860888

scots are bloody great at ripping into people.lol

Those lads were Irish you tw@! Where do you think Belfast is?

We were singing along to the radio when a guy at work boasted that he had seen the Beatles perform 'Yesterday' live.

I said, "I doubt it you lying [oops], three of them are dead."

I love yoghurt. It's everything my girlfriend isn't.

Sweet, fat free, and all over my cockk right now.

Jimmy puts his hand up. "Miss," he says. "Would you do anal?"
"I beg your pardon?" says his teacher.
"I mean, would you take it up the arse miss?"
His teacher explodes. "You just stay behind after school and see me, young man!"
"Good," beams Jimmy. "I was hoping you would."

Captain Mainwaring must be turning in his grave at the thought of all those German's invading London in a couple of weeks.

"When might we take the kids to Disneyland?" the wife asked me a few weeks ago.

I thought about it, and replied, "May."

It's been a blast watching her pack, and the kids getting excited. All I did was correct her grammar.

Jamie Carragher joins Sky Sports.

Don't bother pressing the subtitles button, even that will struggle.