Since you are in the mood for humour MIck, here's one for ya:
A doctor in Dublin wanted to get off work to go fishing, so he approached his assistant.
"Mick, I am going fishing tomorrow and don't want to close the clinic. I want you to take care of the clinic and take care of all me patients".
"Yes, sir!" answers Mick.
The doctor goes fishing and returns the following day and asks: "So,Mick, how was your day?"
Mick told him that he took care of three patients. "The first one had a headache so he did, so I gave him Paracetamol."
"Bravo Mick lad, and the second one?" asks the doctor.
"The second one had indigestion and I gave him Gaviscon, so I did sir" says Mick.
"Bravo, bravo! You're good at this and what about the third one?" asks the doctor.
"Sir, I was sitting here and suddenly the door flies open and a young gorgeous woman bursts in so she does.
Like a bolt outta the blue, she tears off her clothes, taking off everything including her bra and her panties and lies down on the table, spreading her legs and shouts: 'HELP ME for the love of St Patrick! For five years I have not seen any man!'"
"Tunderin' lard Jesus Mick, what did you do?" asks the doctor.
"I put drops in her eyes."
:p