I know I shouldn't laugh Growler but that's quite funny!
Quite right. You SHOULDN'T.

You cannot even begin to imagine the magnitude of the sh1t I'm going to be in upon his return. Believe me.

Some fold are totally anal about their cars.
My son is on a completely different level higher than them.
Only 18 months old, and he spends an absolute fortune on having it 'detailed' every 6 months.
He showed it at the recent Ford fair down your way with me in mine if you recall?
Yup, I'm probably going to be maimed for life